School Me: Lessons I Didn't Want to Learn

Stripper pole in her bedroom?

Why . . . why in heaven's name does a 13 year-old need to have fingernails like this? Do her parents have her in some early-admission stripper training program? (And yes, these nails do offer a marvelous accent to her typical wardrobe.)

And more importantly, how the hell am I supposed to teach her keyboarding? You should have seen her today trying to type with these ghastly things!